From Grasping to Bearing Witness - Listening to and listening with in professional communication: a phenomenological-hermeneutic exploration with two vignettes

In professional and interpersonal communication, an instrumental view of listening often dominates: listening as information acquisition and problem solving. In this article, I distinguish this mode of “listening to” from an existential mode that I call “listening with.” Listening to is a serious attempt to understand the Other as well as possible, but it carries a risk: the Other’s story is quickly absorbed into my own frame of reference, after which my response says more about me than about the Other. Listening with is not a superior technique, but an ethical attitude of availability and restraint: I stay with the Other’s appeal without wanting to possess, conclude, or repair him or her.